If you knew me

If you were to meet me in person you might not like me. Okay that one needs some explaining. I've always
been a bit shy, but like everyone once I've warmed up to people I never stop talking :) This is going to come out a bit scattered but I'll do my best. I lived in FL for most my life. For as long as I could remember I always had great friends, catholic and non-catholic. I had an awesome homeschool group and an awesome church community. Then when I was in 6th grade my dad lost his job and we had to move. At first we looked to stay in our area, because we had such an awesome community. Unfortunately we ended up moving to GA. I was upset that we moved, but I tried really hard to make some new friends. For those of you who don''t know GA is part of the bible belt, Catholics in this area are a bit sparse, not that it really matters what your religion is, at least I thought so. Anyways I tried to make friends. I joined the local homeschool group, I did drama with them, I did different activities. For my effort I was shunned. I would go and the people there would ignore me, they already had their own cliques and I was not welcome. I joined another group this one a Catholic one. Still I was left out. I looked for friends in my church community and I was left out. Everywhere I tried I was hurt. After a year or so I was done trying. I was hurt. I started questioning. What was so wrong with me? Was I too fat or ugly? Was I too boring? I didn't know and I kept wondering why people hated me. I couldn't make friends. I shut myself down. Around my family I was a happyish person, I was me. When I went out I would  I became a stone wall, quiet, uninterested, basically a blank slate. Some nights I would cry myself to sleep, wonering why people didn't like me. I wondered if I would ever have friends again or if I'd go through life lonely. 


To be cont....